A podcast milestone, a chatty catch-up, and a summer pause

#154. Join your two favourite hosts as we celebrate (or try to!) a podcast milestone, chat about life, and explain our podcast plans for the summer.

We (Chris & Claire!) are revelling in a huge podcast achievement in this episode, and we're doing it in a way only the British can - with mild joy and plenty of guilt and comparison! So join us for tentative celebrations, a relaxed catch-up as we reflect on life lately, and updates on what we're hoping for in the months ahead.

As always, the conversation takes a few unexpected turns (and may include a little TMI!), so grab a cuppa and spend some time with us. You'll also find out why there won't be any new episodes for a few weeks - and when you can expect us back.

Thank you so much for listening, sharing, supporting, and being part of this community. Reaching our special milestone (you've got to listen for that nugget of information!) simply wouldn't have happened without you, and we're incredibly grateful. 

Transcript

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Welcome And Why We’re Here

Claire 0:02

Hello, and welcome back to The Silent Why podcast. I'm Claire.

Chris 0:05

And I'm Christopher.

Claire 0:06

And we're a childless couple after infertility, which is where our passion came from for lots of different kinds of loss, and that's how this podcast was born.

Chris 0:15

And you didn't question the fact I said I'm Christopher.

Claire 0:17

No, I didn't. I was so focused on my next line.

Chris 0:20

Very special occasion.

Claire 0:21

You're right, it's very special.

Chris 0:22

Yeah, so we're a podcast that explores loss, all kinds of it, all kinds of different permanent loss, and we're looking to see if hope can exist in every kind of grief. We're also a resource to help people get through grief, whether that's after the grief occurs or to equip ourselves even before something like that happens.

Claire 0:39

And this episode is actually sort of the last one before a summer break, which I've done a few times before. I've had August off podcasting for lots of different reasons. Trying to think of what some of them were. I think one of them was a little bit of burnout in the first couple of years. So when we first started the podcast, we used to put out two episodes a week. Which when I tell people that now, they're just like, What? Yeah, that was mad. Why did we ever think that was a good idea? I don't know, but that's what we were doing. And then people were having trouble keeping up with the content. I think it was a lot of content. So we made it once a week and then we made it once every two weeks. But yeah, in that first time when we were doing two a week, I think we had got to an August at one point, and I was just like, let's have a break. Because we don't really break any other time of the year. So that's partly why I like to write and I wanted to focus on trying to do some finishing touches and things to my novel. So it's always a good time for that. And it's a very noisy time on our estate. So it's a really hard time to do interviews when there's a lot of child noise outside the windows. So that's partly why we stopped in August, and I'm just continuing that.

Chris 1:39

Some may think of the word estate being like a country pile. It's true, it's not a country page. Deer with antlers, yeah.

Claire 1:45

I think so park.

Chris 1:48

So you're living in your mansion in our estate where deer are rutting and groups come in tweed to shoot. That's not the kind of estate we're talking about. This is suburbia. Yeah. So if I was to open the window, I don't know if you can hear it now. Oh, open the window. Uh we have a family. It's all very lovely, but they're playing baton ball with some children. Uh you can't hear a thing. Next no, you can't hear. I'll shut the window. Next door are currently inside. So at some point there could be we might need a safe word in case they come out and just as soon as they get on the trampoline in the next garden to where our garden is, it becomes incredibly noisy with screaming and playing, sometimes crying. So yeah, August can be a very hectic month for trying to record.

Claire 2:29

It's really difficult to interview someone about grief and loss and these big topics. And sometimes we're talking about loss of children and different things. You know, I think for some podcasts you could just get away with it, it's background noise, whatever. But I think for us it feels like it's a bit trickier. So yeah, that's part of the reason. But also when you mention housing estate, I mentioned when we were in Australia that we lived on a housing estate, and someone told me, like, oh no, like, you know, you can't you shouldn't reset. Over there, I think it's like a I don't know, I don't think it's a good thing. Oh.

Why We Pause In August

Claire 2:55

I think it's like, you know, like over here, the council estates that we've had that got like a bad name and it's just like that sort of, I don't know, estate. I don't know what we call them nowadays. I don't even know if we have them in the same way. But um, I think it's like that over there. So when I said that we live on a housing estate, that was like a oh that's not a good thing. So depending on different cultures, they may hear estate very differently. Snobs. Anyway, we just live on a housing development, shall we say? There's a lot of houses that overlook our garden and stuff, so yeah. But yeah, so I'm gonna break this August. I think we're doing it.

Chris 3:25

We're not gonna break.

Claire 3:26

I'm not gonna break a break. I'm gonna take a break to avoid. Who knows? Who knows? I think there is a level of guilt when we do this because well, A, we had a break at the back end of last year when we went to Australia. So it feels like, oh no, we're doing another one. But also, you know, people are helping us to pay to keep this podcast going and stopping it for any amount of time does just it yeah, it makes me feel a bit guilty. I know that you feel the same thing.

Chris 3:50

So only because I don't help you by some of the questions I ask you that you're like, Why are you making me feel guilty?

Claire 3:56

Okay, yeah, you make it worse.

Chris 3:57

I I do make it worse.

Claire 3:58

But um, you know, I follow a lot of podcasts that have got loads of people following them on Patreon and stuff, and sometimes they stop they stop putting episodes out for three months, you know, quite randomly, quite regularly. So I'm not gonna feel too bad about it. I try my best to put out as much as I can. But yes, in August I am gonna have a break. So this is the episode before the break. And normally I do that on my own, just explain why I'm having a break. But you were around and we had some other bits we wanted to share, so some very exciting or one particular. I get I don't know, I get really torn about I get really scared about sharing stuff like this sometimes because yes, it's a really lovely thing for us, but then I don't know, it also makes me feel how small we are as a podcast because I know that's what we're gonna share, some people experience every single week.

Chris 4:48

Why are you comparing the two?

Claire 4:49

I don't know. I'm in a bad place. All this comparison, needing a break.

Chris 4:53

Yeah, of course. No, for us, uh it's significant. It's significant. And for us and what we do in our amateur, enthusiastic, hobby, podcast way, uh, it's really good news.

Claire 5:05

Which we've built up so much now that people will be very disappointed by the actual announcement. But yes, why don't you share the news?

Chris 5:11

We've hit 50 downloads.

The 50,000 Downloads Surprise

Claire 5:16

That I would be ashamed at, yes. I've actually got the exact number there. And it is not 50.

Chris 5:21

No, it's not even 500. No. And it's not 5,000. Imagine that, a 5,000.

Claire 5:28

Well, we wanted to we wanted to hit a thousand downloads in our first year. That was our goal. Actually, we started in September and we said how cool would it be to hit a thousand before December? And we did it in the first year. So that was quite that was quite cool.

Chris 5:40

Well, without us expecting anything, because we were not looking at this, we were not building up to it, we were not thinking about it, but suddenly the podcast, whatchall, provided that we use, the host that we use, or the business that hosts our podcast. Uh, we had a notification from the app that we use, and uh it said, You have reached 50,000 downloads.

Claire 6:03

You missed out the full figure that I put on the screen.

Chris 6:04

No, no, that's what it is now.

Claire 6:06

Yeah.

Chris 6:07

That's not that's not what the notification the notification didn't say congratulations, you've reached 50,002 downloads. I like that there was 28 more. 50,000 downloads.

Claire 6:16

Yeah, it did.

Chris 6:17

And we were like, What? I think I even heard you in another room of the house make some sort of noise, like, what? We weren't expecting that. Yeah, and I've got to be like, I couldn't believe it. You came and found me and said, Look, look at this. And uh I couldn't believe it. As I say, we weren't looking out for it. We don't monitor these things in particular.

Claire 6:36

Well, when you have a podcast, with I don't know how other hosts do it, but Buzzsprout give you a sort of a celebratory image that you can share with people when you've done a thousand downloads, and then I can't remember exactly what the figures are, but it's like five thousand, ten thousand. But it stops at I think twenty-five thousand until you get to fifty. So at twenty-five thousand, I was like, Yay! And then I just forgot forgot about it because it's so long, you have to double it to get to your next one. Um so I hadn't even thought about any reaching any of those, and then yeah, when it popped through at the weekend, I was like, yay! That's amazing. 50,000 downloads.

Chris 7:05

Amazing. So download is presume, you know, every time somebody accesses an episode of the podcast, and we've been doing this now for what, three years?

Claire 7:13

Uh 2021. Really? Five years in September.

Chris 7:16

Five years. Yeah. So the episodes that we've done, whether it be blogs, my wise, whether it's our main 101 loss episodes, all that sort of back catalogue. When somebody finds an episode like that, accesses it uh and listens to it, that's one download.

Claire 7:32

Yeah, and that is the confusing thing about podcasts. People are often like, do I have to actually download it to give you a download? And you don't. A listen gives us a download. So it it is yeah, it's a it's a bit confusing. You don't have to actually download the episode. But um, yeah, every listen. I think it has to be a listen of over like a minute or something. You don't get it just by listening for three seconds and then coming out again.

Chris 7:52

But um But if I imagine in my mind a sports stadium filled with 50,000 people or arena, people watching a concert, 50,000 people, that's a lot of people. It is. And you think that our content uh that we're trying to put a bit of good out there, um restoring hope, finding hope, searching for hope in the midst of difficult, challenging circumstances to think that that content has reached 50,000 people.

Claire 8:18

I'm just doing the math because if one person listens to every episode we've done, which is nearly 200, that's only one person, but 200 downloads.

Chris 8:28

Potentially you're diluting.

Claire 8:30

I'm massively diluting it. I think I mean but that is the reality, I think.

Chris 8:34

Yeah, and the reality is, as you pointed out a short while ago, it's not 50,000. It's 50,000 and 28.

Claire 8:41

Push it up. We need it up.

Chris 8:42

It's the exact sum.

Claire 8:43

Yeah, so it might not be the amount of people, but it yeah, definitely the amount of downloads.

Chris 8:47

Well, well done. Well done to you. Thank you. Well done to you. All the extra episodes and bits you've put out. Uh, well done to me for not questioning the lack of episodes in August.

Claire 8:59

Yes, you're a harsh taskmaster.

Chris 9:01

We are a good support for each other. Yeah. Uh but it is, yeah, it's nice to mark these these milestones in a sense.

Claire 9:08

And it is it is hard, it's really hard not to compare because if you listen to any podcast that's, you know, one of the big famous ones, potentially they'd be disappointed with 50,000 per episode. So it's really hard at times to then kind of think, oh, I've done this in five years. And And it's not for me, it's for the guests. I would love the guests to think that they got like a hundred thousand dinos on their episode. I mean, that must be the coolest thing to give people a platform for their stories, especially ordinary people. I want to say that, you know, we've got so many ordinary people on our pop-ups which are what I love. They're stories about real people going through real stuff. They're not celebrity interviews, which there are so many of nowadays. So I would love to give them like even more of a big platform, but it is such a hard medium to to get found unless you have some sort of either celebrity presence or you make it such a full-time job. Budget would be pushing stuff out there. Very helpful.

Chris 10:06

Um good point to just pose that small challenge that if you're listening and you're thinking, yes, I would love this to be out there doing more good stuff, reaching ears where it needs to be heard, maybe there's particular episodes that have really chimed with you. Is that the right sort of metaphor? Have struck a chord, another musical metaphor. Then if you haven't shared it on social media,

Sharing, Reviews, And Getting Found

Chris 10:35

if you haven't written a review, like rated the podcast or written in a review on your podcast provider, some some of them allow you just to give a little rating and and to uh review the podcast, that's really helpful. Obviously, sharing episodes on social media gets this stuff out there, and then the algorithms with all these podcast providers, whether it's like Apple Podcasts or Spotify or what's the one you've got me into using? Uh Pocketcast. Pocketcast. All that, all the algorithms, you know, obviously push to the front of the queue. Not that there is a queue, but push forwards in the searches and things, those that are being listened to, those that are being found. I think you've mentioned it before on the podcast, but you you asked AI, didn't you? You asked an AI engine to recommend podcasts about grief and finding hope and grief. And it didn't recommend the Silent Why podcast. No. And then you asked AI, why are you not recommending the Silent Why? And it gave you a very good answer.

Claire 11:28

Yeah, basically I think that you know I've said I've told a lot of people this that in some ways our podcast is a terrible idea for a podcast. And I think what it fed back to me was a little bit similar. Because it's not on one track, so it's not just grief, it's lots of different types of grief. It does dilute down, I think, well it definitely does who who listens to it. Each loss almost has its own audience, so each episode can do very well in its own little community, but it doesn't necessarily follow that the person who really loved that episode about, you know, um, a cardiac surgeon and loss in surgery or loss of a child or loss of an arm or loss of eyesight, it doesn't follow that that person who liked that episode would want to listen to lots of stories about loss. So it's quite a niche little market of people who are actually interested in loss as a whole and all the different types of it. So I think when it comes to something like AI trying to work out what we're doing, it's probably something that's like, I don't know what to do with this. And that's probably partly our you know, we could we could market that better, probably. Yeah, I it was helpful to look at and think, yeah, okay.

Chris 12:31

What what you're saying is we've turned up a global virtual book festival to push a library.

Claire 12:38

Little bit. Yeah, little bit. We've got a lot.

Chris 12:41

Uh which has its own little yeah, area, but I think I can hear some of our supporters saying, screaming, for goodness sake, you two stop analysing everything. Yes. Stop trying to dig too deep and just enjoy the moment. So well done. 50,000 downloads is a lovely milestone to mark in July 2026, five years after starting the podcast, that we've reached 50,000 downloads.

Claire 13:07

And it's a nice time to have a pause. It's like pausing on a high, which is nice. I don't want to pause in a bad place. It's nice to And I looked at the I like to look at the locations and where we're picking up people. And mostly that that 50,000 is split between North America and Europe. But we have also got quite a good little chunk, and in the thousands, for Oceania, I never know how you pronounce that. Asia, South America, and Africa. So we're across all the little lesser towards the end, more in the hundreds. But um, yeah, it's a nice split. I love looking across the world.

Chris 13:36

Amazing what the internet has allowed. A lot of bad stuff, but a lot of good stuff as well. Yeah, definitely. We can broadcast, we can share messages of hope, encouragement, and they're picked up across the world.

Claire 13:46

We have reached loss sixty-six, so we're well over halfway. I know it's slowed down a bit in the last year, but yeah, loss sixty six of 101, that's um not that many to go. No. We can't do the maths quick enough.

Chris 13:56

But we because we you know we were in a run a couple of years back where we were doing those uh sort of every ten episodes we were doing a a bit of a summary, weren't we, of the last ten. And they felt like they were coming around quite quickly.

Claire 14:08

Not anymore.

Chris 14:09

Uh no, no, no, we'll get back on that. For goodness sake, you two. What are you doing?

Claire 14:14

We'll get back on it. We have got some really interesting ones actually already set to record over the summer for September. One in particular, I think, is a bit different, which is lovely. And we've just we introduced uh Yaya, oh gosh, when was it? I don't know, a month or two ago, uh, about loss of sight, which is one that for a long time I've wanted to speak to somebody about, and it was really lovely to be able to chat to him, really honestly, about a young guy who just very suddenly lost his eyesight. And what is that kind of grief like? So that was good. And whenever I do one of those a bit different or that we haven't spoken to about before, it does reunite, re-ignite

When AI Can’t Classify Grief

Claire 14:45

my uh my fire for finding some of the more losses. But obviously, as we go on, it's gonna get harder. And there's some really obvious ones we haven't done yet, which I'm keeping for the right guess. But it will think it'll be just the same. To find them, I mean harder to find. Yeah. When we get to ninety-eight, we might be really scrabbling around for a loss of the loss of a toenail the loss. We're gonna be looking for anything you've lost in the house or in the last few weeks.

Chris 15:12

Well, y you mentioned just a few words about uh being in not a great place a short while ago, and I thought, well, actually I must ask what place you are in, because the last time we did this was uh around Christmas time.

Claire 15:24

New Year.

Chris 15:25

Did we do New Year's uh we did Christmas, where are we? I think did we do a new I don't know if we did a new one? But yeah, anyway, whether it was Christmas or New Year, that was seven months ago, nearly eight months ago. Yeah. So what has the year been like? How could you even summarise the last eight months?

Claire 15:41

Um Oh crumbs. I don't I don't know. I mean it's still I think in some ways it's a bit of a it's a bit of a continuing journey. And I think a lot of people that listen know that you know I've had health things that have been frustrating over the last ten years. I'm still on that journey. It's probably not where I'd like it to be.

Chris 16:01

We've been saying ten years now for probably about 13 years.

Claire 16:04

Maybe. But um yeah, it's it's been a long journey, and I did hope at the beginning of last year, not even this year, that I was on to a winner with this new treatment I was having. That's taken longer to settle than we we hoped. And that yeah, it's really annoying because when when my hormones are not in a brilliant place, it really affects a lot of things mentally for me. So the motivation and interviewing and coming up with ideas and contacting everything the podcast needs from me is really hard when I'm in that season. So that's part of my frustration, is that that's one of the things that suffers because you know I do everything in-house. There's nothing that we I don't have anybody doing anything else for me. So that's why the social media goes a bit quiet and I have to do all the editing and so it's it's yeah, it's a difficult thing. I feel for the podcast in particular, because I think that takes the biggest hit when I'm in that place. So I think it's been a bit up and down

Health, Hormones, And Motivation

Claire 16:55

with that still. So the last few months I feel is just it's still just a little bit surviving and just trying to get to a place where I feel like we can just hit start on life again and then just go for it. So yeah, maybe a little bit disappointing because by now I would definitely have like thought I would have been in a slightly different place. But it is on it on a it's an upward trajectory. It's certainly not bad, and it's it's definitely but the best I've been on so far, and it's you know, there's a lot of good things. But summing up the last few months, I feel like I'm still just on that treadmill of just normal day-to-day waiting for life to just really begin again. So hopeful for the back end of the year, but really feeling like this August is is a nice time to just pause the podcasting stuff for a bit and try and get my mojo back with um motivation.

Chris 17:39

Yeah. Well if I can help you find your mojo.

Claire 17:42

Thank you.

Chris 17:43

Then I will.

Claire 17:44

I do find I'm sure a lot of people will feel this with grief, that when you're in a place that you're slightly down for some reason, whether that's because you're tired or you're stressed or you're going through another grief or the stuff going on, it just highlights a lot of the stuff around you that would trigger um that's not my favourite word, but would trigger you know the grief. So I do find that when I'm in this place, it's harder to be around people talking about children, or people who have got really good careers, or people that are on a high, or things that are going really well. I find that a lot harder to be around when I'm like this, and I've thought about that a lot lately and thought I don't feel like that so much when I'm in a good place. And I imagine that's the same with a lot of people with grief. You can get to a stage where you're living with it, and it's there, but it's not a downer day-to-day. And then maybe you go through a patch of just something being difficult or tiredness or and then suddenly that grief just it feels like it just takes over a little bit more than it normally does. And so I have noticed a few more things of just trying not to dwell on stuff in a in a negative way. And that was why it was actually really good with the last episode I put out with let's chat, um chatting to Karen Sutton, because she was talking about where we put our focus in grief and how that can have a huge impact on how things go, how we navigate everything, and she'd lost her husband very suddenly left on her own, uh looking after their two young girls. But had this amazing kind of approach to you know how important it is when you choose where to place your focus. And I am I'm quite intentional with stuff like that, so it's really helpful to speak to people like that and then just focus somewhere. Even if you still feel it, just to have that focus in a in a healthier place rather than getting too caught up in the negative and then spiralling into something. Yeah, how about you? Yeah, great.

Chris 19:27

How about me? Actually, what you were saying there, I thought we've just we've made a friend this year, haven't we? Someone joined our church. Shout out to Mags, who's childless. She's Asian in her early 70s, and uh never married, no children, and it's been lovely getting to know her and sharing some experiences. We've still got a lot to learn about her. But it's been lovely just adding that extra dynamic to our sort of church family, and for our own good, um, we've become good friends with her and just been able to ask those questions and having having an ally, really somebody else in a very family-friendly community, and has found contentment and peace with not having some of the things that that we're still wrestling with. So that's been that's been nice over the last six months. Um for myself, uh it's been a mixed a mixed year, I'd say. Uh I'm very much heading towards that sort of well, a little bit like you were saying there, I'm heading towards that new year. Again, we're only what four months from the next new year. Of saying, oh, that's another year done, and I haven't really I don't feel like I've progressed in a sense. There's been the last two months, and this isn't to do well, I d I don't know, it's I don't think it's to do with any of my sort of grief story, but I've really felt like I've been quite bad, unwell even with with hurry. Hurry sick, as some people might call it, hurry sickness. Um we've you know the last two months our time has been filled. Um my time certainly during my my work, which has been full on, and then we've got a lot of commitments outside of work with church, uh with family, with some other projects that have required a lot of attention. So we've had several weeks where uh every evening we are out, I'm home from work, and then we eat, then we go and do something or part of a meeting or whatever, whether that's together or apart. And uh yeah, so I think I'm just coming out of that time which I'm really grateful for because it the thing I'm most the thing, the worst thing about it when I get into that place is it makes the days and the weeks f absolutely fly by because you're sort of rushing from one part of the day to next. You sort of get started in the morning, and it's like, right, I've got any s only so much time to lunch time, and then lunchtime comes and goes, I've only got so much time before I need to get home. And then you get home and it's like, oh crumbs have got to do all this and this before, and then it's the neck next day, and we're like, Oh, how's another day done already? Uh and the time is absolutely flying by. By and I'm reading things that are telling me about the benefit of stopping and appreciating and being thankful for and resting and Sabbath. And

Hurry Sickness And Redeeming Slow

Chris 22:10

it just feels to me like a mirage. It's like I don't know how to do that. Uh I I I think I know how to do it, and I plan to do it, and then I don't do it, and I get frustrated that I've not done it. So that's the last few months and the year. I think the year started quite in quite a low place. I think I was quite low at the start of the year, and then it got much better and has been it's been a lot better from March, April onwards. But yeah, I think just to finish off with, I would I'd love to I'd love to get to the end of a year and just feel like wow, that was a really good year rather than that was a year. What's the next year gonna look sort of looking ahead to the next year? I'd love to feel like we've done something in a year that's just been mega for us.

Claire 22:56

Life just feels too short. Maybe we're more aware of that because of who we're speaking to on the podcast and stuff, but uh life feels too short to have a whole year where not much happens, but also where you don't know how to to change that. And I think that's what I've found quite frustrating. Some of the hurry stuff that we read, um one of the really interesting things was someone pointing out that we've made the word slow such a negative thing. If someone is slow mentally, it's a bad thing. If sales are slow for a business, it's a bad thing. We've put this word slow on lots of things that are bad rather than it actually being. I really like the idea of somehow redeeming the word slow to bring it back to actually this is a good thing. Like living life slowly and enjoying it is a good thing, it's a good way to be. We shouldn't always have to be. We've got this whole kind of it's bad to be fast and living a busy life and hurrying, but then we've got oh, it's bad to be slow. It's like well, where's your middle ground? Definitely what have we got that's in the middle? So I do think it's a nice thing to try and redeem.

Chris 23:57

Well, I I know, and whether it's just the UK, whether it's elsewhere in the West or elsewhere in the world, I don't know. But certainly in the UK, I'm absolutely convinced it's not just a me thing, it's not just an us thing, because so many other people are talking about the the same things the last three months, the last six months have just been insane, like they weren't expecting. It's like, what is that? Is that something in the sort of the atmosphere? Is it something spiritual? What is it that so many people in the UK are talking about just the the pace of life being uh unwanted, unwelcome, and surprised by it? Like we didn't we didn't want this to plan for it. What's what's gonna break or what's gonna change? So it's not just a me thing, um, but it's definitely something in the water or in the atmosphere.

Claire 24:44

Yeah. No, I think it's um something to be aware of. I don't quite know how to change it, but I think that's one of my frustrations is that we get we start to book things in and we start to do more because I start to feel like I'm feeling better, and then we have a season like that where it's really busy and I'm just like I can't I can't sustain this. I'm not and maybe nobody could, I don't know. Um and then you have to cut back again. And it'd be nice to just find a rhythm that's A, I'd like to be healthy enough to find a rhythm and be able to keep it for a while. But also it'd be nice to find a rhythm in life where you just you're not heading into weeks that are mad and crazy and then weeks that are revity. And but yeah, I do just wonder if that's life nowadays and we just have to.

Chris 25:20

Well, our expectations are pretty high, aren't they? We we expect and hope for some really good things. And again, those things you read and hear about just being thankful for the small stuff. It's like I I I understand it and I get it, but it's not it's not good enough for me. Maybe that's wrong. I want bigger, I want better, bolder.

Claire 25:41

Yeah, I think we spent a long time being thankful for small things. I think that there can be a time when you do that and you do it for a long time that you actually you can be a little bit like I want more. It's easier for people to be thankful for small things, I think, when they have a lot sometimes.

Chris 25:54

Yeah, don't settle for 50,000 downloads when you could have 50,000 and 28.

Claire 25:59

Exactly. So yeah, I don't know. Life is confusing nowadays, it's difficult and it's hard, and it feels like you can't really speak about half the subjects that are out there that are interesting because everyone's got strong opinions on things, and yeah, it's it's not easy out there. So um I think we just we do what we can.

Chris 26:18

There's two uh two

Friends, Faith, And Finding Allies

Chris 26:20

little individual uh nice little moments. One, you had a a special visit from somebody we met through the podcast. I did, yes, lovely friend, yeah uh three weeks ago.

Claire 26:30

Yes, I had uh Maddy come and visit, which is lovely. She was one of our guests on the episode where I spoke to two people um from a hospice and she was one of the managers there, and so she was talking about what life is like in a hospice. And we did meet her when we went up to see round the hospice when we were passing after I'd done the episode to meet her in person. Uh but I've only met her once. But yes, I've kept in contact with her, and yes, she popped in. Actually, she said to me, uh, I'm passing on this particular date because we're right next to a motorway, and people travel up and down the country, and so quite often, if people are passing, they can just stop in. And she said she was passing, and she said, Can I pop in on this date? And it happened to be my birthday. So I was like, Yes, of course you can. So um, yeah, she came for a couple of hours when we had a catch-up, and it was lovely, really lovely to see her. So, yeah, I love making friends through the podcast, and there's so many I'd like to, you know, meet in the flesh one day. I've got another one. Laurie was one of our guests on the podcast. She's in Canada. I love sharing experiences with her about what life is like in Canada with the snow and the sunshine, and they've got raccoons in their country for Pete's sake. And yeah, we've never met in the flesh. So one day I'd like to meet her. So, yeah, there's lots of things like that that are always lovely. So it was really nice to spend time with Maddy.

Chris 27:41

And then also one of the podcast's biggest fans who's such an encourager that we couldn't believe when we connected with her that she lives about 40-second walk from our house.

Claire 27:54

Yeah, she's the same number as us in the next street.

Chris 27:56

In the next street along Sarah, who's joined the Sarah Henderson. Buy me a coffee coffee.

Claire 28:01

Yeah, so um Sarah Henderson gets a shout out because of um the level that she bought on Buy Me a Coffee. So shout out to Mrs. Sarah Henderson.

Chris 28:09

What do you mean, the level that she bought on Buy Me a Coffee?

Claire 28:11

Well, that's what we'll explain next. Okay. So Sarah signed up to be a regular member on Buy Me a Coffee, and you can do this. I just want to point out you can do this for one month or you can do it for a continuous section of months. We really don't mind. Either way, you get some benefits depending on the level that you sign up to. So the level starts at £3 a month, and there's there's not a lot of bonuses for that level, I'll be honest. It's it's a minimal. Yeah. I'm just trying to see what I've actually put on the website. What do you get? You get the knowledge that I will be doing a small dance of joy and thanks. There you go. It does um I was gonna say brighten my heart. That can't be the right lift. It lifts my heart.

Chris 28:48

It brings me cheer.

Claire 28:49

You get that level. Uh then there's five pounds where you get a shout out on the website, and then there's ten pounds, fifteen pounds, twenty pounds, and forty pounds, which I've never had anyone sign up to, but there are lots of benefits, including a one-on-one chat and zoom with me. Nobody wants. I'm gonna sign up to that. And you can have a written or audio interview on the podcast, basically, about anything you want to chat about. Now, you don't have to, I was thinking about this, you don't have to sign up for like more than one month with any of these. Like I said, you get the bonuses if it's just for one month. So I don't I don't I probably shouldn't be pushing that, but I do want people to know that. So that £40 a month, if you just wanted to come on the podcast and chat and have a Zoom with me, apparently, and a blog topic, there's a whole bunch of things you get for that £40, but you don't need to do it once. Um, so anyway, we've got these different levels, and you can sign up to these. And Sarah signed up to um one of the levels which gives her uh a voucher for 25% off her next Herman, a shout-out on our support page on the website, and a shout-out on the podcast, which is what we're doing now. And then she can also choose a blog topic or a film or TV review for me to do as a my Y episode. So yeah, that's what you get from that. You can just buy a coffee on there. They're actually fancy teas for me, so I don't drink coffee. Or you can sign up regularly. So one off or sign up. If you want to support the podcast in any way, shape, or form, that's the way to do it. And I want to just thank everybody for those that do support, either one-off or regularly. We've said this many times. This podcast is literally continues to go because of these people. I currently am not in any paid employment, I don't have any income coming in, there's no benefits, there's there's nothing I bring to our household financially. So these people are keeping it going. I don't know if it was a cost to run, if we would have kept going with the podcast, because putting this much effort into something that is costing you money is very different from doing something that actually pays for itself. So I am very grateful, as I know a lot of you listening will be, that these people pay to keep the podcast running. So thank you to everybody. Another high, just thinking of people who've been generous supporters over the years, is another previous guest, Greg, uh, messages me quite regularly. He loves England, um, he's over in America, and he's often talking about stuff he's seen on TV or I'll share stuff. And he told me about a book recently that he'd read, Theo of Golden. I haven't read it yet, it's in my book pile. Um, and I went to go and get it at the local library, and there were 45 people ahead of me waiting for this book, and I have never seen more than about six people ahead of me, and that was for a Jilly Cooper that's been made into a Disney

Buy Me A Coffee And Listener Support

Claire 31:20

Plus season. But this one is obviously huge and very popular, and not many copies of it. So I said to him, I put my name on the list, might be a while, and bless him, he sent it to me in the post. So um, yeah, there's some lovely blessings from you listeners out there, and I'm so grateful for every person who comments on something, who likes us, you know, one of our social media posts, who follows, who shares it, who donates money, who tell other people about it. You know, it's just lovely. One of our um listeners said that she was she went for some therapy and she was telling the councillor all about our podcast in case it was helpful. I was like, that's amazing. So yeah, just so grateful for everyone out there that has helped us get to 50,000 downloads. So um 50,028. It might even be higher.

Chris 32:04

Don't yeah, don't do that.

Claire 32:05

I'm gonna ch I'm gonna check while you're listening if this could be a huge let down. Because I only checked a few hours ago, so there's a very high chance it's the same. But I'm just gonna log in to Buzz Sprout.

Chris 32:16

Okay, while you're doing that, Sarah, if you need any inspiration for recommending a blog topic or something like a film review that features Grief and Loss, the Ballad of Wallace Island.

Claire 32:28

Oh, that is a good one. I should do that anyway.

Chris 32:31

Recently watched that twice. Yeah, we did. And that's lovely, very funny.

Claire 32:35

Really lovely, beautiful theme of loss through it.

Chris 32:37

It was a British comedian called Tim Key uh with a friend of his when they were younger, they made a short film, quite sort of home movie-esque, and they were basically just doing it again with a budget with a studio behind it. Yeah, did a really good job. British people know Tim Key for things like I'm Alan Partridge and whatever else.

Claire 32:57

Yeah, it was really good. And I massively, massively recommend it. Very light, very gentle, very sweet. Yeah, worth watching. And we're the numbers are in. It's gone up. It has gone up. We have 50,029 downloads. Thank you to that one person that just downloaded.

Chris 33:16

Oh, be still my beating heart.

Claire 33:18

I wish it could tell me the last place it got downloaded, but I I don't think it does. So never mind. But um, yeah, that was really.

Chris 33:26

This was supposed to be a short chat, by the way.

Claire 33:27

I know, and now I've got to edit 40 minutes worth of podcasts.

Chris 33:30

Sorry about that.

Claire 33:31

Anyway, it's fine. We do it for the listeners.

Chris 33:33

Good job, I'm in such a good place mentally.

Claire 33:35

Well, yes. Even though before we did this, I was like, I don't feel like doing this. It's amazing what I can do for my listeners. Yeah, just to say that yes, we have got more episodes coming up. Somebody said to me a while ago, um, one of the listeners messaged and said, I'm gonna um what are you gonna do when you get to 101? I'm really sad that you're gonna stop. We don't know. But it's taken us five years to get to 66. So there's a good chance we're here for at least another four to five years.

Chris 33:57

Oh, imagine the celebration. We have to plan something when we get to 101.

Claire 34:01

Yeah, you are listening to two almost OCDE perfectionist completer finishes. So I don't think I could live with myself, knowing there's a podcast out in the world with my name on it that did not complete its mission. So if we have to rush them out in five-minute episodes, we will get this out. So definitely not

What’s Coming Back In September

Claire 34:20

going anywhere. I've also got an episode I wanted to do that a couple of people have asked me about because I have mentioned it to people. Um, a lot of you know that I had an auntie Olwyn um who died earlier in the year. She was 106, and uh I want to do an episode on the loss of her because I do think the loss of someone that old is very different to the loss of a a different age. But also, she went through the Second World War uh here in England in Portsmouth as a 20-year-old. Uh, she's got a lot of amazing war stories. We interviewed her about them quite a few years ago, and I've got them all on audio. So I want to put together an episode. I haven't managed to do it yet, but I will do it after the break of us chatting about her, about the loss, but we're also going to play quite a few of her stories. So we've got an episode that compiles them all together somewhere, and they're really lovely, very human stories about the war in England. Uh, and they had a lot of bombing where she was, so she's got a lot of experience of of that sort of loss. So, yes, I'm really looking forward to putting that together.

Chris 35:14

That'll be a that'll be a complex episode to put together.

Claire 35:16

It will, that's why I've slightly put it off because we need to sit down and talk between stories and all that kind of stuff. But yeah, I want to do it just for for those of us in our family that want to hear it, but also for it's it's just so like a uh I was gonna say memento of her, but that doesn't sound right. I'm not my brain's not working brilliantly. You mean I can't. A thing that just is out there about yeah, memorial and a sense of. Maybe someone's shouting the word at us. But anyway, yeah, you know what I mean. One of those tribute. A tribute, yeah, that's it. Yeah. A tribute to her. So that's that's coming up. And like I said, we've got another couple of losses that are going to be interesting. Uh, and we will be back in September. I haven't set a date for which Tuesday that will be, but it will be September.

Chris 35:53

It's timed very well, by the way, because that there is an emerging next door on the trampoline.

Claire 35:59

Oh, they're arriving.

Chris 35:59

So uh yeah, we've timed this very well.

Claire 36:02

Perfectly. Perfect. I meant to say perfect. Oh my word. This is why I'm not doing much on social media at the moment, my brain. Okay, yeah, so thank you for listening and for being here. Thank you for all the downloads. Thank you to those who are still faithfully sticking with us, even when we're a bit less on the ball with interviews and things. And uh be assured that we are still here, still thinking, still working hard for it, and uh, we will definitely be back in September.

Chris 36:27

Check the number again.

Claire 36:28

Check the number.

Final Thanks And Goodbye For Now

Claire 36:30

Okay. I've I'm almost a hundred percent sure this won't have changed. I don't think I've ever felt so confident about anything in my life. I'm just gonna refresh the page. Nope. 50,000 and 30. It would have been nice to have gone out on 50,000 and thirty. I could probably make it happen with my phone, but I won't. It won't be that. No. Brilliant.

Chris 36:50

Good on you. Have a good August. Enjoy your writing.

Claire 36:53

Thank you, I really will.

Chris 36:54

And uh I'll see you as soon as we stop recording. And we'll hear you again on the podcast.

Claire 37:00

Yeah.

Chris 37:01

Uh in September.

Claire 37:02

Thank you, everybody. Bye. Bye.